“It’s All In a Day…”

Pressing In, Bearing Down and Stepping Back

February 6, 2012 By Teri Leave a Comment

“There is more to life than increasing its speed.” ~Mohandas K. Gandhi

Clearly…

my life for the past few months…

has consisted of to-do lists…

responsibilities…

and moving…

at times rather rapidly…

to the next decision or task.

Yesterday found me…

along with 3 of my 5 children…

at the beach…

staying over with Son #1…

after the party of a dear family friend.

Son #2 had to work…

so came home with his dad and grandparents.

Sure…

there were many things still looming…

as “unfinished” on my list.

And as I felt the pressure mounting…

yet again…

I decided enough was enough.

My kids are straining…

under this ever-present pressure as well.

After we went to church together in the morning…

met one of the most fascinating people…

I have ever had the privilege of listening to…

speak…

Son #3…

who could normally…

run, flip, and unicycle circles…

around 10-12 people with ease…

declared, “I’m tired and need a nap.”

While he slept…

Son #1 and I…

took #4 and #5…

to the LEGO store…

grabbed Starbucks…

visited about work, life…

and caught up on friends…

we’d seen in Seattle.

(#1 and #2 didn’t come along to “Snowmaggedon.”)

As we drove back to Son #1′s…

we witnessed this sunset over the ocean…

picked up a then-well-rested #3…

and went to dinner…

at a favorite beach restaurant…

before we headed home.

My continuing post…

was one of the things…

I traded…

for fellowship and rest.

And I don’t feel a bit sorry.

I hope this week…

or sometime very soon…

you, too…

will ignore the tyranny of the urgent…

for fellowship, a breath or two…

and blessed rest.

We all need it.

See you Wednesday for more Seattle highlights!
TeriSig

Filed Under: "It's All In a Day...", Real Life

Shakespearience: Or in this case “A Shaking Experience”

November 4, 2011 By Teri 10 Comments

A most sincere thanks for the Happy Birthday wishes regarding TommyMom. You guys are the best! In keeping with the “fabulous prizes” promise…

Today, I’m going to share a story…

inclusive of “moments or horror” or “situations gone wrong.”

Let’s face it…

we all have them.

I find it therapeutic to be vulnerable…

whether we are ready…

willing…

and able.

Or sometimes not.

It keeps us both humble and real.

Compassion is not one of my greater strengths.

I can be empathetic…

sincere…

pretty unconditionally loving…

but bring compassion into the gig and well…

not so much.

To be clear…

here is the definition:

“Sympathetic pity and concern for the sufferings or misfortunes of others.”

Keep that in mind…

as I now bare my soul.

Warning: This situation isn’t overly pretty.

Twice now…

we have had the pleasure of attending this event.

After today…

you will clearly see…

that for our family…

“California’s number one field trip…”

took on a whole new meaning!

Said event…

is roughly 3 hours from our home…

and of course…

by year 2…

erroneously thinking…

that I was somehow qualified…

I volunteered to chaperone.

Which translates into…

“get there even earlier and look informed.”

The premise…

is that you will see vignettes…

of several Shakespeare plays…

performed by professional actors.

It is quite impressive.

It provides the inspiration necessary….

to cause individuals…

to enthusiastically embrace each and every play…

wanting to learn more.

Well…

most individuals.

This kid…

by nature…

is extremely easy-going.

A steady Eddy.

Rarely, if ever phased.

On this action-packed morning…

he quietly confessed…

“Um, Mom…

I’m having diarrhea.”

Me: ” Are you sure?

( How moronic can one seemingly-seasoned mother be?

Read on.)

We’ll stop and get you some medicine.”

#4: “Shouldn’t I maybe stay home with Grandma?

I mean, this is a 3 hour drive.”

Me: “You’ll be fine. Trust me.

Besides…

we’ve already purchased your ticket.”

Lacking in Compassion maneuver #1.

Standing outside of Rite-Aid…

I coaxed the children’s version of Imodium…

passed his unsuspecting lips.

He gulped several times before completely swallowing.

#4, complete with pained look of shock: “What WAS that?!”

Me: “Children’s remedy for diarrhea. It even has a minty flavor!”

#4: “Have you ever tasted it?! It’s awful!”

Shows me his teeth very dramatically….

“Do I have hair on my teeth?”

Me: “Don’t be ridiculous.”

#4: “Is the enamel still there?”

Me: “Get in the car, please. We need to be on time.”

Manuevers #2 and #3 combined.

The directions clearly stated…

to repeat this transaction…

every 30 minutes…

“until relief was found.”

I was watching the clock…

administered dose #2…

mission accomplished.

#4 is ashen, but resting.

As we approach Fwy. #2…

the next 3o minute interval approaches.

Sons #1,2,3 and 5…

are all sound asleep.

I passed the ~~hemlock~~ Imodium back.

#4: “Mom, please. I think this potion has killed people.”

Me: “Just plug your nose and down it, brother.”

What number are we on? Sigh.

#4: “I simply can’t. It’s vile.”

As he attempts…

that dreaded…

vulgar..

yet unmistakeable-to-all-humankind sound…

begins to rise from deep within his being.

In fact…

quite possibly from his poor toes.

And seconds later…

you guessed it!

Sons #1 and #3 are upright, erect…

and totally coherent…

in the middle seat.

(Or in this case, death position.)

#1: “HOLY CRAP!…Did someone VOMIT?!”

#2: VOMIT!, VOMIT!….WHERE?!

#4 is now crying, because he’s guilty as charged.

Me: “EVERYONE CALM DOWN.”

# 54, quite possibly.

#3: ‘ROLL DOWN THE WINDOWS IMMEDIATELY…

OR I MAY BECOME SYMPATHETIC-BY-SCENT!”

#1 to #3: “FORGET THAT! IS THERE ANY ON MY SWEATSHIRT? LOOK CLOSELY!”

Hero Hubby…

who is rarely along on these outings…

and driving…

having zero clue…

that the rear window behind him is in disrepair…

obliges.

We are now doing 85…

all windows are down…

and the children…

are sounding intermittent…

in the newly-induced wind vortex.

Unison: “D-A-A-A-D.”

Hero Hubby ( HH): “A-A-R-E T-T-H-E-Y C-C-A-L-L-I-N-G M-M-E?”

Me: “T-T-H-E-Y-’R-E T-T-R-Y-I-N-G T-O I-N-F-O-R-R-M Y-O-U A-BOUT THE W-W-I-I-N-D-OW.”

HH: “WHAT W-I-I-N-N-D-O-O-W?

Through sign language and manual teamwork…

the window miraculously closes.

We pull off and signal the family following.

We’ve heard nothing from Son #2…

up until this point.

In a deserted not-yet-open Lowe’s parking lot…

he steps gingerly from the Excursion.

There he stood…

absolutely covered in mint-green Imodium..

from the waist down…

in his socks…

which could easily have been rung out.

Get ready…

here’s the Leadership example of all time…

uttered from my lips…

“Where are your shoes?”

Yes…

we are that family.

Pathetic…

isn’t it?

People…

at times falsely pedestalized…

are mere mortals…

with “feet of ~~clay~~ Imodium.”

Son #2, with a leveled gaze and eerily calculated tone…

“WELL, MADRE. I DECIDED TO SLEEP.

I TOOK MY SHOES OFF…

PUT THEM UNDER SAID SEAT…

SWUNG MY LEGS UPON THE LAP OF #4…

WHO GENEROUSLY OFFERED…

AND THE REST IS HISTORY.

I THINK, QUITE POSSIBLY…

WE SHALL BE LATE.”

Two-mothers-of-ten-kids-between-them…

race to a nearby Target…

and could easily be mistaken…

for an episode of “Shopping Cart Wars”…

while racing at break neck speeds to obtain…

Industrial carpet cleaner…

Febreeze…

new jeans for #2…

and socks for #2 and #4.

Upon returning ~~Hero~~ Hasmat Hubby…

(Lowe’s is now open, praise Jesus!)

emerges from a suspiciously sparkling…

outstandingly clean…

“spring fresh scent” laden vehicle.

HH: “Get in. I’m all done.

Send #2 into the restroom quickly to change.

I think I can still make it.”

We arrived 20 minutes late.

That, my friends, is a feat on record!

Leadership Education…

fosters and encourages the ever-present emergence…

of threads of similiar patterns and thoughts.

It applauds the ability to connect ideas and concepts together…

that perhaps bring new or further enlightenment into every subject.

Two months later…

I was reading a George Washington biography to #4 and #5…

that is age appropriate.

I was thrilled when it mentioned…

his friend, Cincinnatus.

Excitedly…

I ran for the college-level text…

painstakingly written by William Durant…

in which he chronicles the retirement exploits…

of Washington’s friend.

“Cincinnatus was content to withdraw to his farm…

where he dabbled in husbandry…

extensive pharmaceutical endeavors…” ( paraphrased by me)

That…

was all the further I got.

Stricken, #4 inquired in a high, somewhat fraught tone…

“Did he, by chance, invent Imodium?”

I had to leave the room.

Share something that became disastrous for you. Share freely. No condemnation. After all, it’s smooth sailing after this particular expose’!

The winning number will be chosen next Wednesday, by Random.org. What will the winner receive? A succinct overview biography of Mother Teresa, fully illustrated, along with affirmation cards in a ceramic stand. Imodium not included. Yes I have my own copies of both, thanks.

Son #4 is very well adjusted, refuses to even look at Imodium, and just saw his first full Shakespeare stage play since this incident. Son #2 still sports the jeans. Thanks for wondering.

It’s your turn.

Filed Under: "It's All In a Day...", Happy Birthday, TommyMom!, Leadership Education, Love to Learn, Real Life

Autumn Offering

October 24, 2011 By Teri Leave a Comment

I shall be Autumn
this Halloween,
with leaf draped skirt,
and folds of
boysenberry velvet wine
flowing to the ground.

Brown stained face,
eyes rimmed in gold,
nails dripping sunset,
a crown of twigs
to cover my head.

You may gather from me
the spring of my youth,
my summer of maturity,
and hold onto with me,
the solace of these days
of remembering
before the frost.

Filed Under: "It's All In a Day...", Real Life

A Memorial that Honors

October 14, 2011 By Teri 4 Comments

As promised…

today I will share…

some thoughts…

about my brother Tim’s Celebration of Life and Memorial.

There are so very many aspects to this story…

and yes, I will share them all with you over time.

After today…

we will take a breather from this topic.

I’m heaving a sigh of relief.

I’m certain many of you are, too.

I know that time heals all things…

but in the end…

from a mere mortal perspective…

it still doesn’t make them right.

Yet…

there were so very many things…

about Saturday, September 24th that were.

The crowd was a magnificent yet humbling thing to behold.

The venue appropriate, comforting, and stellar.

Sort of my brother’s “living room” if you will…

with the football field right out back…

sporting its own powerful icon of grief.

Tim and I have joked forever…

about the fact that there is humor in all things.

There really is.

I understand that some people…

are gifted with “funny”…

while others are not.

Tim used to tease often…

about the dangerous gene pool…

of cynicism and sarcasm…

from which Sons #1-#5 come.

‘Tis oh so true.

Indulge me a portion of these…

to lighten the load…

where this story is concerned.

Newport High School is an icon.

I get that everyone thinks…

their former school is…

but Newport is.

And it wasn’t even my school.

It was built in the 1960′s…

and then totally and completely renovated three years ago…

except for the “Holy of Holies”….

which is the gymnasium.

Son #1 wandered in and immediately asked…

“What’s that noise, Mom?”

I looked up…

from where I was busy staring at my own vivid reflection…

in the beautiful, pristine, lacquered wooden floors…

that easily double as a mirror.

My brother loved that gym…

complete with retro buzzing lights.

Once Son #1 was enlightened…

he wanted to know why…

they “couldn’t be fixed!”

It dawned on me…

that for the most part…

other than events pertaining to my brother…

my kids really hadn’t been exposed to gym life!

Son #1 was reeling when looking through clubs…

organizations and the like which one can join…

to confirm that he would, in fact, be dubbed…

a genuine “nerd!”

I laughed and reflected on how differently…

so many of us would choose…

to behave…

and conduct ourselves…

if we could go back and be afforded the chance.

I honestly don’t think Tim would’ve needed to.

There will be much more on that later.

I chose Newport for several reasons.

Today, you should know…

that he coached football there for 23 years.

Other gyms sport far more modern amenities…

including lights that are high tech.

But this day…

was all about Tim…

and the kids.

Hundreds of them.

They came from far and wide.

Only some were no longer in their youth.

His own friends…

former students…

players…

and peers.

There is little doubt that education is in crisis.

Know that the people within the system…

to which my brother was called…

and with whom he lived and worked…

are consistent…

passionate…

faithful…

character-filled…

individuals.

And on this particular day…

along with the system…

they were in crisis as well.

There was Don Harney…

an incredible teacher…

through our own high school years…

who both spoke and emceed the day.

My brother was inspired in the classroom…

where he and Thad McManus…

became the plumb lines for what teaching should be.

Both eventually became powerful mentors and friends.

Mike Miller…

Head Football Coach at Newport…

young enough to have been a student…

and Tim a teacher…

but now a powerful friend…

mentor…

and associate.

Bruce Brown…

whose wisdom…

insights…

and presence…

have indirectly graced many posts here on TommyMom…

due to his profound influence on my brother.

Only our father influenced Tim more.

His friend Rob Luckey…

with whom he committed more than one…

“near felonous act” when people…

began to think too highly of themselves…

their careers…

and the forms that they levied upon others.

Bryan Duncan…

Grammy and Dove award winning artist…

who sang…

but wanted most to be remembered as Tim’s friend.

And then there was me.

As I stood before that sea of people…

I had epiphany after epiphany…

involving so many things.

Influence can be forced…

or cultivated through relationships.

My brother always chose the latter.

Those relationships were diverse…

sincere…

and personalized.

It was what…

in the end…

compelled people to fly coast-to-coast…

travel home for the weekend from college…

both in and out of state…

and causes even those of you…

who possibly never met him face to face…

to openly and sincerely grieve.

There is intense rivalry between high schools…

that sadly…

can at times carry over or just begin to manifest…

between people claiming…

the responsibilities of an adult life.

For one beautiful intense week…

that culminated in an extraordinary day…

they were all laid aside…

in order to honor the common ground.

It’s exactly what Tim would’ve wanted…

and what he genuinely lived for.

I hope and pray each of us can say the same.

TeriSig
“We don’t mend each other’s brokenness; we just hold it tightly.” ~ M. Craig Barnes

Filed Under: "It's All In a Day...", Driver's Ed., Leadership Education, My Brother Tim

Ground Swells

October 12, 2011 By Teri 2 Comments

“In the end, it doesn’t matter how well we have performed or what we have accomplished—a life without heart is not worth living. For out of this wellspring of our soul flow all true caring and all meaningful work, all real worship and all sacrifice. ~ Brent Curtis and John Eldredge

I have had the privilege in my life of being taught by Dr. Oliver DeMille. It is a meaningful experience in and of itself; but one conversation between us, though seemingly small and relatively insignificant at the time, is profoundly different to me now.

At George Wythe, there are beautiful portraits that hang on the walls, of individuals that have changed the course of history. Each time I went there, I found myself drawn to them. They’re powerful.

One day, after a lecture I was taking, I went up to Dr. DeMille and stated-while-asking if you will…

“Those people all did amazing things. I’m wondering, though, if it bothers you at all that some of them had some interesting “issues” in their personal lives.”

In his typical fashion, he was totally unruffled by my rather brazen approach, smiled broadly at me, and stated the following…

“You’re right, Teri. Some of them had downright questionable behaviors in their personal lives. What I’m wanting through their presence here, is really twofold: They serve as both inspiration and reminder. You see, each of those people created a ground swell in the history of the world. They changed policy. They lived conviction. In more than one case, they died because of it.”

Wow.

It was a wow then, and, as I said earlier…

an even greater one now.

I have known for quite some time…

that my brother Tim was a world changer.

While this was confirmed in more ways than one…

an obvious one was evidenced at his recent Celebration of Life.

He was one individual…

tragically young…

and hundreds upon hundreds of people…

gathered to remember him.

Many more…

continue to pay tribute.

I have been asked…

to initiate a scholarship/foundation/fund…

in his honor.

Currently, I still have no idea what that will look like.

But it is in the works.

I’ve been thinking a lot about what Dr. DeMille said.

Why do some people live huge lives…

even in seemingly short, compact periods of time…

while others…

live comparatively insignificant ones…

when we hold them to the revealing light…

of eternal impact and human potential?

I think the answer begins in the opening quote.

Heart and soul.

They are requirements when cultivating ground swells.

Here’s my plan.

Let me first thank all of you that have offered your condolences…

supported me with prayer, love, texts, Facebook messages…

and your own tears.

My gratitude and thankfulness are simply impossible to fully convey.

Many of you have shared with me how Tim personally impacted you…

either through his contributions here on TommyMom…

or through your personal contact with him.

Still others have just realized…

that it was THE Tim, from TommyMom…

who shared, counseled and dialogued…

that passed away.

Yes, it was him…

my brother…

and only sibling.

In the midst of this indescribable grief…

there are treasures and surprises.

Since his passing…

I have found over 100 articles…

that he had written on various subjects…

along with a precious gift of his “Friday Footnotes”…

bound and given to me by his Insight staff.

There are some that have previously been shared with you here…

but still plenty to come!

Most of you know…

that Dr. DeMille, is himself, quite physically ill.

The nature of his illness has required that he withdraw from being a physical presence.

Both he and my brother can, however, still contribute.

Mightily.

It just involves you being willing to do the work necessary to gain the gems.

You must read…

ruminate upon…

and process…

what they are saying.

Then…

you must do the necessary work to find the answer…

since they aren’t physically present to help you.

In the process…

I’ve found…

that it honestly helps those that are willing…

to find even greater heart and soul.

And who knows…

if and when…

this will aid in the production…

of a ground swell?

Once a month…

Tim will still contribute to TommyMom…

and I will write a piece…

that begins to examine…

through humor…

insight…

and the eyes of a sibling…

how greatness develops over time.

I think we’ll enjoy it together.

Friday…

I will share with you…

what comprised his Celebration of Life.

I think I shall be strong and brave enough by then to share.
TeriSig

Filed Under: "It's All In a Day...", Driver's Ed., Leadership Education, My Brother Tim

A Profound Silence

October 10, 2011 By Teri 6 Comments

We went to the beach yesterday.

There is honestly something extremely comforting about watching the waves form, swell, crash…

and dissipate into frothy foam that oozes out onto the sand, and then pulls back…

to start the process all over again.

We are a family that is seriously spent.

It has been three weeks since my brother’s passing.

There are times that it seems like yesterday…

and others where eternity appears to have taken over.

Here is what I know.

That both grief and pain have their own ominous silence and space…

in this journey of life…

and the eventual sounds they make and lessons they teach…

cannot be ignored.

Much like the waves…

they swell…

(albeit in their case, unexpectedly)…

they seem to pound…

beat…

ebb…

and dissipate.

And like the predictable nature of ocean tides…

they are inevitable in this life.

How we process…

respond to…

and deal with them…

will either cause our spirits to erode…

producing clusters of bitterness and pain…

that are as sharp and impenetrable as barnacles…

or produce a shift that harnesses…

the potential for even greater strength, power…

and effectiveness.

I’m still sometimes in silence…

embracing sounds…

and feel pounded and beaten often.

But nestled inside of the turmoil is hope.

Even now…

as profound and raw as the loss of my brother is…

I am looking forward to sharing him on an even deeper level with all of you.

I’m confident that were he still living…

there wouldn’t be the need or the ability to do so.

Even in his profound physical silence, he still has so very much to offer and to teach.

It will be my honor and privilege to have you join me in this new journey.

I’m anxious to share more.

Filed Under: "It's All In a Day...", Leadership Education, My Brother Tim, Real Life

Family: There’s Simply Nothing Like It!

August 22, 2011 By Teri Leave a Comment

Whew!

Last week…

was a whirlwind one…

here at our house…

culminating…

in the wedding…

of my nephew Nicholas.

It’s given me…

cause to ponder…

the power of relationships…

within families.

This week…

will feature…

posts celebrating…

this subject.

At the same time…

I realize…

for some…

memories of family…

don’t coincide…

with celebrations at all.

I also believe…

that each of us…

has the ability…

to change history…

and cycles.

A family…

and home…

wield incredible power…

to teach…

train…

model…

embrace…

nurture…

guide…

and love unconditionally.

They afford us…

the privilege of not only leading…

but also being led…

of molding and refining…

while being shaped…

and defined ourselves.

I hope your desire…

and commitment…

is to build and nurture…

great ones.

A legacy…

is built…

one day…

one lesson…

one affirmation…

at a time.

“It ought to be so, in every well-ordered home, that a child can find more pleasure at home than away from home…Wiser parents secure to their children such home amusements as cannot be indulged in to the same advantage outside of that home.” ~ H. Clay Trumbull, Hints on Child-Training, 1890

“You as a parent have a big advantage in teaching your child simply because you are the parent. The most significant people in a young child’s life are usually his mom and dad…You may think that you’re something less than the world’s best parent. You might also think that you can’t possibly educate your child as well as a state certified teacher might. But because, subjectively, you are the most significant and important person in the world to your child, you have greater credibility with him and can get more mileage out of instructional time than anyone else could. And that is an objective reality.” – Gregg Harris, The Christian Home School, Wolgemuth & Hyatt Publishers, 1988

TeriSig

Filed Under: "It's All In a Day...", Leadership Education, Love to Learn

Twitterpated!

July 27, 2011 By Teri 10 Comments

I’m deferring…

from the regularly…

scheduled post…

for reasons…

that will be evident shortly.

People ask…

“Do you write blog posts…

ahead of time?”

Yes.

“Do you write the evening…

before you post?”

Yes.

As you can see…

flexibility…

is the name of the game!

At times…

whatever works…

simply takes over!

I did have…

the blog posts…

planned out…

for the remainder…

of this week.

And…

I do generally…

have “blog specific” times…

that I try to follow.

However…

the best laid plans…

This afternoon…

Son #2…

was sighted…

near the computer…

looking somewhat shocked.

Son #2: “Oh.my.word!”

Me: “What?”

Son #2: “Melmutt…

(which is the name…

they address my father by…

long story for another time)…

Melmutt…

wants a Twitter account.”

Me: “WHAT?!”

Son #2: “We need…

to leave…

for the karate dojo…

so I told him…

I’d have…

to help him later.”

Me: “I’ll help him.

Are you sure…

that you heard correctly?!”

Son #2: “I’m positive.”

I digress here…

for a moment…

to reflect upon…

the life-long…

Love of Learning…

that my father…

has faithfully…

exhibited…

and modeled.

He is extremely…

well read…

and a voracious reader at that…

starting first and foremost…

with his core book…

the Bible.

Each.and.every.day.

He can intelligently discuss…

a plethora of subjects…

and is always up…

for learning something new…

isn’t easily…

intimidated…

by daunting…

or difficult obstacles…

and is always…

a gracious and teachable spirit.

He’ll be 75 next month.

He’s plagued…

with some serious health challenges…

yet remains the eternal optimist…

and possesses…

an incredible spirit…

of gratitude.

Sure enough…

upon investigating…

his whereabouts…

I was greeted…

with a broad smile…

and enthusiasm…

when I inquired…

about the Twitter account!

Dad: “I’d LOVE one!”

My dad…

has an iPhone…

because the Hero Hubby…

purchased it.

He took up texting…

immediately…

and was relieved…

to leave…

his three-letters-on-one-key…

model behind!

He’s a texting machine!

I kid you not.

I’ve been…

the recipient…

of many.

As we were setting it up…

I casually inquired…

as to “why” he wanted it.

Dad: “Well…

I read an article…

in the newspaper…

this morning…

and the local sports guy…

invited me…

( figuratively speaking…

of course!)

to follow him on Twitter.”

Me: “Wow, Dad!

So…

any ideas…

about what you’d like…

your Twitter name to be?”

Dad: “I’ll be Melmutt5…

for each of my grandsons.”

Me: “Well…

you need a reference e-mail…

for your account.”

Dad: “Phooey. I don’t have one.

Just use your mother’s.”

A few minutes later…

my mom enters the scene…

as dumbfounded…

as Son #2 was!

Mom: “You will not…

believe what just happened!

My e-mail account…

just informed me…

that I needed to confirm…

my Twitter account!

I’m being spammed!”

Dad: “No, you’re not.

I’m on Twitter.

Relax.

Just confirm…

and move on.”

At this point…

I’m honestly wondering…

if I’m in the Twilight Zone!

I’m happy to report…

that he’s up…

informed…

regarding basic functions…

and is following…

per the invite…

of said reporter!

Consider yourselves warned.

He’s following my brother…

he’s following me…

Son #1…

and he may very well be…

looking for you!

Truth be told…

I aspire…

to be half…

the person…

my father is.

And…

I’ll be…

minding my P’s and Q’s…

in the social media world!

Thanks…

for the example…

of loving to learn, Dad!

May your Tweets…

inform…

and your followers…

be many!

Filed Under: "It's All In a Day...", Leadership Education, Love to Learn

Leadership Education: Exactly HOW Do I Do It?

July 25, 2011 By Teri 2 Comments

The following was originally posted on May 17, 2010. This will be an interesting week at our house; including a “first” for our family. Son #1 is moving…both “out” and “away.” It’s a parent’s “nightmare.” Or is it? Posts this week, will involve a look back as well as personal thoughts. Enjoy. I know I am relishing my last week of the only type of family life I’ve known thus far is concerned. Here’s to change! ~ TommyMom

This past Saturday, I participated in a conference call for people interested in Leadership Education. A condensed description of the call went something like this:

“Teri Helms of TommyMom.com will discuss “How Do You Do It?” focusing on Four Keys: Classics, Mentors, Inspire and You”

Whew! This looks great on paper, doesn’t it?

Most everything in life does.

And then you get to live it out.

That’s where things can sometimes get tricky.

Admittedly, Leadership Education is fascinating, intriguing…

interesting.

Most things that are outside of the box are!

One thing that really remains true, however…

is the fact that you simply can’t tell someone “how to do it!”

It is the acknowledgment and implementation of principles…

that are the tenets…

pillars…

foundations, if you will…

to a way of life.

And each life utilizing them is different.

If I “tell you how to do it”…

then you are equipped to “copy” me.

Scary thought, I know!

The more effective route to go, in seeking an answer to a very common question…

would be to examine what universally defines Leadership Education.

I mean…

how do we think that diversity…

such as has been highlighted in the mothering journeys…

of Katherine McCauley and Amy Maus…

arrive at the same goal?…

Share any form of commonality…

other than being human?!

We’re going look at some thoughts offered by…

the “Obi-Wans” of Thomas Jefferson Education.

They certainly aren’t the only qualified mentors…

but…

in my opinion…

and experience…

they are the most organic in their approach.

This helps everyone…

wherever they are on the journey…

to have a clear cut…

no “bells and whistles” framework…

for defining their own family, as well as personal, journeys.

Obi-Wan #1

and Obi-Wan #2

Which brings me to point number one.

The mentality of Leadership Education holds to the fact…

that everyone is created with genius.

It is the job of the mentor to help bring that genius to the forefront of the individual.

The mentor helps the student through inspiration…

to develop and channel independence effectively.

People are wired for independence.

Mentoring takes on many different forms.

You can read..

listen…

experience through physical presence.

I am fortunate to have had all three of the above mentioned modalities…

with these two gentlemen.

I share this…

because having a love of learning definitely comes in handy.

So do copious note taking abilities!

This way…

I can visit…

revisit…

and revisit some more.

Important skill and a good one to hone!

Leadership Education is education that is internalized.

It goes deep into the heart and soul of the individual…

helping to define who they are…

and what their purpose is for being on this earth.

Classics.

Classics are works of literature…

or bodies of writing…

that put you in touch with tremendous thoughts and ideas…

rather than a “committee” of mediocre minds.

Generally speaking…

most textbooks fall into the category of mediocrity…

rather than inspiring and encouraging a range of great thought.

They teach you “what to think”…

not “how” to think.

Knowing “how” to think…

again, generally speaking…

threatens “the system” or the “process.”

Leadership Education is a model…

that fosters a pioneering spirit!

It isn’t looking to copy…

but rather to innovate and create.

It also realizes that there are many things worth fighting for…

and that true education aids and fine tunes those things.

For example…

professionalism can be an aid...

but it isn’t education in and of itself!

With this in mind, then…

setting an “age limit” or defining an “arrival point”…

can be both a dead end and a serious point of frustration.

For example…

saying that someone “has to achieve thus and such”…

at exactly a certain age or point in life…

can be a trap.

This is a life long process!

It’s a beautiful journey…

that can successfully be pursued by all…

and it is immeasurably worth the effort!

I think that the following poem beautifully depicts the calling…

as well as the privilege…

of the mentor…

and of the awesome rewards that come…

from utilizing this model called Leadership Education.

It is from a speech given by Garland Wright.

“Come to the edge…

It’s too high.

Come to the edge…

We might fall.

Come to the edge…

And they came.

And he pushed them.

And they flew.”

In order to glean more information about taking classes with Dr. Shanon Brooks…

using the Leadership Education model…

you can visit here.

Filed Under: "It's All In a Day...", Leadership Education

You Go, Girl!

July 20, 2011 By Teri 1 Comment

I mentioned…

in Monday’s post…

that I would highlight…

this particular “rage”…

at another time.

Now is that time.

I’ve stated before…

that the LEGO afficianado…

within these four walls…

is Son #4.

His ability…

to craft…

virtually anything…

from this resource…

never ceases…

to amaze us.

I’m anxiously…

awaiting a toothbrush…

from the stuff!

That’s where…

I’ll draw the line.

Son #5…

loves it as well…

but assigns it…

a place and time.

Son #4…

is honestly…

rarely, if ever…

without it.

Just recently…

I apologized…

in a place of business…

for an unexpected wait.

He promptly produced…

enough characters…

for himself…

his brother…

and nearly every other child…

within a three chair reach!

It also helps…

that this particular theme…

is based in the martial arts.

It’s as if…

the LEGO Gods…

looked down…

upon our household…

and smiled.

From ear to ear.

Ninjago…

is a game…

much like any…

of the other games…

that became frenzies…

reducing parents…

to endure…

near-death experiences…

at retailers nationwide…

during the holidays!

There are characters…

that you lock into bases…

that spin.

When I say spin…

I mean…

at speeds…

that could leave…

abrasions!

Son #5…

has been…

sucked into…

the Ninja vortex…

mostly due…

to his highly competitive nature!

People ask me…

ALL.THE.TIME…

how I “manage”…

to “hold my own”…

“survive”.,..

“keep my sanity”…

with 5 boys.

In ways…

I admit…

that I…

appear to be a “blip”…

on the radar screen…

entitled “Helms!”

We even have…

male pets!

I do…

consistently…

seek out opportunities…

which reinforce…

that…

1) I’m a girl.

( Yes, in their young years…

they have all argued that point!)

2. Girls are really good at “stuff.”

Mostly…

I want them to realize…

that women…

should be respected…

and are world changers!

In my…

very-outnumbered-case…

because all…

of effective Leadership Education…

is based on relationships…

and how strong they are…

I’ve pretty much…

resigned myself…

to the fact…

that I will forever…

be exposed to everything…

from “Bob the Builder”…

to John Wayne’s…

entire cinematic catalogue…

throughout…

the remainder of my life.

I was the only woman…

at the midnight screening…

of Terminator 3.

I’m secure in these facts…

and dealt with them years ago.

So…

while watching…

Sons #4 and #5…

“chose their new guys”…

I seized the moment..

when I came across Nya!

She’s one.boss.Ninja!

With two different faces!

The boys were stunned.

Her card revealed…

a high power level.

You betcha, boys!

Now we’re talking!

Sensei Wu…

pictured here on the right…

possesses the most power.

Therefore…

it shouldn’t be a shock…

that he’s #4′s.

Rightly so.

“Jay” to the left…

is #5′s…

“because he’s blue…

and I like him.”

We enter the ring.

The spin…

on Sensei Wu..

and Jay…

is overwhelming!

I can hardly see them!

But…

slow…

first-time-in-the-ring, Nya…

wins out!

In this case…

every round!

It was a deafening…

albeit one-sided…

“roar” that went up!

The boys…

were very gracious.

They were in shock.

This story…

is a tremendous word picture…

of my life…

at this moment.

Crazy busyness…

as well as responsibilities…

have left me spinning.

And it’s a lot faster…

than I can currently…

get Nya to go…

due to lack of experience…

and skill.

Leadership Education..

and its principles…

can seem like this.

But head games…

are dangerous.

Most of the time…

it’s a temptation..

to allow perception…

to out-spin reality.

See…

Nya possesses…

two weapons…

where even Sensei Wu…

can only claim one!

Her double gold swords…

are more than a force..

with which to be reckoned!

There is much talk…

about curriculum…

being prepared for the Fall…

and how to best meet…

your children’s needs…

spinning around…

within home education…

communities right now.

These can be…

good things…

in and of themselves.

For me…

some of the greatest power…

when things get a spin…

comes from re-reading…

the core materials…

of TJEd.

I’m in the process…

of doing just that.

Regardless…

of how many times…

I’ve read…

“A Thomas Jefferson Education”…

or studied the tenets…

of “The Student Whisperer”…

they are my golden swords.

The surrounding TJEd resources…

my power cards.

With them…

I stand firm.

No matter who’s spinning…

where they’re headed…

or how much energy…

they’re packing!

It’s all good!

I want exuberant…

whirling dervish…

Love of Learners!

Most of all…

I want them to believe…

beyond the shadow of a doubt…

that I care.

I invest.

I’m interested.

That I’ll evaluate…

examine the process…

and educate myself…

first.

And…

I’m a viable…

force to be reckoned with…

because…

in return…

I’ll have the power!

When I turned on…

my iPhone the other day…

this came up…

as my wall paper!

They get it.

I’m a girl…

that’s fully engaged…

invested in power…

to assist…

with knowledge…

as they play their cards.

And together…

we’ll win!

How about you?

Are you fully engaged?

Power Up!

Footnote: I am extremely honored to be guest posting tomorrow at thetuckerstaketennessee.com for my good friend, Meghan Tucker. For those interested,I am sharing some tips about raising boys. They reflect my personal worldview, for those readers who don’t. Just a fair and friendly warning, not to be mistaken as an apology. ~ TommyMom